I have been meaning to write about this topic for some time now but never got around to it because I always thought of something else or had something else to write.  But, first off, some people seem to think that just because I am incontinent means that the whole “diaper loving” thing goes out the window and does not exist for me.  They are correct AT FIRST, when I was younger I will admit that diapers were a burden on me but then coming to the realization that they were going to be a part of my life – you learn to deal with something and make the absolute best out of it.  So, slowly from between middle school and the end of high school I became more and more accepting and loving of diapers.  And, it just grew from there.  So, the aspects that many typical diaper lovers and adult babies enjoy – I enjoy most of them as well.  I love the feeling of a wet diaper, having a diaper change, the crinkle noise, and the feel of a messy diaper.  I am going to try and describe what it is about a messy diaper that I like and makes me feel satisfied, I guess you could say.

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A messy diaper for many is probably is the ultimate babyish feeling when wearing diapers because it represents the ultimate loss of control and needing to be changed.  That is probably one of the main reasons I love the feeling of a messy diaper.  When you mess in your diaper its a feeling of satisfaction because now you have done the ultimate babyish thing.  There you are sitting in a poopy diaper needing someone to change you.  I like that feeling.  I am lucky that I have Peter to be there whenever I do accidentally poop my diaper.  He makes sure to take care of everything because he knows I like when he takes control in situations like that.  So, here is how it goes down a lot of times.  I come home from work and typically he gets home before I do so he is watching TV (usually sports lol) and I just come in and put my stuff down and kiss him “Hello”.  Then, I usually get on the computer and check everything and for some reason that period of the day (evening) is a trigger for something in me to poop.  Sometimes I feel it kind of coming and sometimes I don’t – if you don’t have fecal incontinence then its an extremely hard feeling to describe when you have to poop.  You can’t control it but sometimes know it is coming.  So, that is a big time when I mess my diaper and Peter knows to check me a lot of times around that time based on history.  So, I will go start making dinner and he will usually wander into the kitchen and pull back my diaper and check me.  Which, by the way is probably one of my FAVORITE feelings is just the act of having him check me.  Then, when he knows I pooped my diaper he will let me finish what I am doing and change me.  But, I will say that I don’t like being in a poopy diaper too long because it can get uncomfortable and I am not the biggest fan of the smell.  I like the bulky feeling at first but once you start moving around and sit down and a few times – it can become uncomfortable with the fecal matter against my butt.  So, I typically like to be changed if possible within 30-40 minutes of messing my diaper.  But, it is more the satisfaction of feeling babyish and the needing to be changed that really makes me love it.  I mean, I do like the feeling of a poopy diaper physically, but I like the babyish mentality of it more.  Sort of hard to describe, honestly.  But, hopefully I got my point across…Oh, and hopefully you enjoyed the photo I included with this post.