The truth hurts sometimes. We have to step back sometimes and take a honest look at ourselves. Analyze exactly who we are and what we are. Whether that is as a community or an individual.

The truth can hurt and sometimes is suppose to hurt. Maybe it is suppose to wake us up or kick us in the butt and tell us to stop our ignorant ways.

The Adult Baby community is made up a variety of individuals and while some are completely capable of doing the right things, there is another group that tends to do the wrong things when it comes to representing the community as a whole. I am talking about those adult babies that feel entitled or expect that because they are this unique person that they can impose their adult baby habits on the public and others.

Diaper Under DressI am not talking about wearing diapers in public or showing your diapers in public on some level. Some people take it to extremes and go prancing around in just a diaper around public areas. That is flagrantly flaunting in my opinion and inappropriate. I know some ABDLs get a kick out of doing that sort of thing but that sort of act you must realize sets a very bad tone for the rest of the ABDL community.

All it takes is one or two people getting caught or in trouble doing these sort of actions and it gets blasted all over the news. Then, America sees the adult baby and diaper lover community as this group of people that just wants to publicly harass people by prancing around in just a diaper all day. Which is completely inaccurate. Most ABDLs are well-respected people.

The sensitiveness of the ABDL topic is important to consider because a few missteps can completely label the ABDL crowd as some sexually-deviant group. Which is also not true.

My point is this. In my opinion, it is completely appropriate if you want to lay out on the beach, minding your own business, in just a diaper. But, taking it to that next level is when you go prancing around the boardwalk at the beach, mall, shopping area, grocery store, etc. I have personally seen this and I just had to shake my head. Fortunately, the person was gone before security showed up but that is the type of action that sets a bad reputation for us all.

I personally encourage those to be confident and brave in not worrying about your diaper showing but sometimes we have to step back and look at ourselves and what we are doing. Would you go flaunt just underwear in a public shopping area? No. So, why would you do it in a diaper? Come on people – I know at least a few of you have considered it that read my blog…just by pure statistics.

I am here to tell you to…Abort Abort Abort. Do not do this. If you want to see our community grow and prosper then we need to semi follow the rules otherwise the public perception of the adult baby and diaper lover crowd will go down. I take a lot of pride in being part of this community and it is something I am truly proud of and protective of. I just hate to read stories of the few in the crowd that give us a bad name and make it more difficult for those people already in the ABDL community to express themselves but also those “newbie” ABDLs to come out of their shell!


By | 2017-07-17T21:42:04+00:00 March 7th, 2014|Uncategorized|59 Comments


  1. Mikeabdl March 8, 2014 at 5:21 pm - Reply

    Another great post Adrian and I couldn’t agree with you more about the importance of exhibiting appropriate behavior to safeguard our unique yet fragile ABDL community. Using sound judgement is the key and being mindful of how one is perceived and construed is necessary when out in public. I never venture outside the home in my diapers without the utmost discretion for fear of being ridiculed and judged and I would never flaunt my ABDL side in a public setting. We have a higher responsibility to show that we are indeed normal people in every way, although we have interests that may not be understood nor socially accepted. Having said that, we need to be who we are and have opportunities to express ourselves and enjoy the things that our lifestyle brings. I have found over the years that it is important for me to be a part of the ABDL community and have like minded ABDL friends to allow me to o express little side in a safe setting. I am proud to be an ABDL, but also realistic about what it means.

  2. Jason March 8, 2014 at 6:48 pm - Reply

    I don’t know what brought this on, but I totally agree. Just walking around in public wearing nothing but a diaper is inappropriate behaviour. Whether you wear because you need diapers or because you like wearing diapers, such rules apply. It’s just common sense.

    • Sofia January 21, 2015 at 8:35 pm - Reply

      I really like your comment Jason. You’re a playful and a DL guy thats still great with protecting the ABDL community. So it seems like you know on whats appropriate when it comes to diapers in public and taking it extremes.

      When you said “such rules apply. It’s just common sense.” it makes me feel like your a smart DL Jason.

      I’m pretty sure its mainly who enjoy wearing diapers are the ones that take it extreme and go prancing in just in a diaper in public places and shopping areas because I think they just find more ways to enjoy their diaper regardless how abusive and inappropriate it is. But it could also be because very drunk or crazy out of their minds.

      Any more ideas why would others take it extremes Jason? 🙂 🙂 🙂

      • Jason January 21, 2015 at 9:28 pm - Reply

        Thank you, Sofia. I try to be. I like to be fun and enjoy myself, but that doesn’t mean that inappropriate behaviour should be condoned.

        • Sofia January 21, 2015 at 11:44 pm - Reply


          Well at least you and Bryan are good and smart DLs. These are the ABDLs we need in our community because we need the right people to grow and show on whats right about ABDLs.

          Yes I understand we what freedom with our diapers but as Adrian said we need to semi follow the rules to grow peacefully and to show the world/public who we are in the right way.

          But Jason us as woman/girls have to be cautious too. For example guys can wear their swimsuits in public by just putting on a shirt because guys swimsuits are pretty much shorts. We as woman, girls can’t just wear a swimsuit and a shirt because then its having just a shirt and underwear since the bottom of the swimsuit will only been since regardless if its a bikini or one piece swimsuit.

          I know this is weird and crazy but I wish I could just wear my 50’s one piece swimsuit but as you said its inappropriate behavior and such rules apply.

          Its common sense that I can only wear that at pools, beaches and watermarks.

          As long as we are responsible as adults we can do whatever we want as us in the ABDL and other stuff as well. We just need to be aware of the stuff we do when its comes to enjoying your diaper and acting like a baby.


          • Jason January 22, 2015 at 12:21 am

            Thank you. I agree. There’s a time and place for everything. Some things are ok for some places, and some times, while other things are inappropriate and would not be ok. There’s nothing wrong with wearing diapers, but there is something wrong with wearing only a diaper. You have to wear something on over it. I wear diapers, but I wear something on over my diapers.

          • Jason January 22, 2015 at 12:47 am

            I’ve heard of the movie, Dodgeball, but I’ve not seen it. It looks like a movie worth checking out.

          • Sofia January 22, 2015 at 12:40 pm

            Its a great movie Jason. Theres a team that just play in just in diapers. 🙂

          • Sofia January 23, 2015 at 7:22 pm

            Hey Jason

            When are you going to see Dodgeball?

          • Jason January 23, 2015 at 7:40 pm

            I don’t know.

          • Sofia January 23, 2015 at 8:14 pm

            Thats ok, I was just curious because I liked that movie.

      • Jason January 21, 2015 at 9:32 pm - Reply

        I wish I knew why some ABs and DLs insist on going out in public wearing little more than a diaper and possibly a onesie, etc. But try as I might, I couldn’t do that myself. I’m not that daring. I don’t mind wearing diapers, but I’d want to wear something over them. 🙂

        • Sofia January 23, 2015 at 8:34 pm - Reply

          Same here Jason, I would want to wear something over my diaper. Do those people not feel embarrassed when they just wear their diaper. Besides whats their point anyway because its hurting our ABDL community when we have those people out there.


  3. Jerry March 8, 2014 at 7:20 pm - Reply

    Maybe you are referring to pilcher(adisc) but in any case you are right on it is totally out of bounds to behave in this way.

  4. Dragon-Knight March 8, 2014 at 10:25 pm - Reply

    Hey Adrian. You got a very good post here as always. I’ll say that I really like the new layout of your blog here. Take it easy and keep up the good work!!!!!!

  5. Bambino March 8, 2014 at 11:02 pm - Reply

    Hi Adrian, while I agree with most of your post except one thing. While I have IC problems and have my whole life, I don’t know about laying on the beach in just a diaper is ok? Would I like that freedom? Absolutely!! The doctor has me on Toviaz. Doesn’t help. I look very young and in shape. I have to wear 24/7 and because of that i would love that freedom. Please know I’m not trying to disrespect you but I want to put reality to this too! While I have seen a picture of you in a diaper on the beach but not Peter. My point is, there is a double standard of women being able to do stuff verses men. I feel very confident that a man on the beach would have a very much different reaction and would or could have authorities called. That would give this community a bad name. Yes this is your blog and your female but I feel you should caution the males on doing stuff like this. Many folks look up to you for your courage. Today I just told my neighbor…he was like wow I never knew. We went running and had great conversation. Please keep each gender in perspective. You have helped me come out of my shell and give great advice. Remember most are males and I’m sure some may try this off your opinions. Remember the other gender as I’m sure you would feel bad if one of them got into trouble from doing that. Anyhow, still love your blog and posts have a nice weekend!

    • Jason March 8, 2014 at 11:10 pm - Reply

      Hey Bambino. I agree with you. There are things that a woman can get away with without negative reactions that a man can’t. Why that is, I’ll never know.

      • Bambino March 9, 2014 at 2:08 pm - Reply

        Hi Jason, I could give my opinions as to why but it would spark a debate on Adrian’s blog that could turn negative and it’s not my place. However, us as men just have to remember that and be respectful and know there are double standard out there. Do you ever like to Skype?

        • Jason March 9, 2014 at 2:13 pm - Reply

          Skype? No, I’ve never tried it.

        • Adrian Surley March 9, 2014 at 4:08 pm - Reply

          I don’t mind debate as long as everyone plays nice!

          • Jason March 9, 2014 at 4:37 pm

            I couldn’t agree more. I’ve taken part in debates where people call people names and things go downhill. That’s not how I like to debate.

  6. Rachel March 9, 2014 at 3:18 am - Reply


    I’m very discreet when it comes to my diaper, but I have to admit I’ve been tempted to suck my pacifier in public. In public is where I truly need it, after all, because I’m prone to anxiety attacks in unfamiliar or crowded places. Would it still reflect on us badly, though, even though I woul be dressed as any adult would be? It would be interesting to do as a social experiment of sorts.

    • Jason March 9, 2014 at 8:29 am - Reply

      I’m not against sucking on a pacifier. Some people have to have something in their mouth. I’d prefer that over a cigarette, or even a cigar.

      • ericklydiaperman2 June 7, 2014 at 7:54 pm - Reply

        I agree Jason, cigarettes and cigars are iky, pacifiers are not.

        • Jason June 7, 2014 at 10:29 pm - Reply

          I agree. I’ve tried cigarettes and cigars, and I hated them both! How anyone can enjoy smoking that crap anyway is beyond me. 🙁

  7. nicole March 9, 2014 at 5:02 am - Reply

    Hi there, firstly I’d like to say that I love your website and what you are doing for the community(s).

    I fully understand the point you are making and I have seen similar comments made relating to other fetishes (e.g. Bringing the public in to a sub / Dom scenario)

    The people you mention wearing diapers in public I suspect are more likely to be in to public humiliation than being just in to being an adult baby (I’m not suggesting that makes it right, but if the public see it that way then it might not have as bigger impact on the the perception if adult babies.

    I’d love to hear your view in people wearing pacifiers in public as well (as mentioned by someone else). I often drive with a pacifier in my mouth….is this as bad as just wearing a diaper in a store?

    I think your point is really valid but there is a huge grey area…. Just wearing a diaper on a public beach is still public but not as public as walking through a busy shopping mall…where do the boundaries lie?

    Wishing you all the very best and keep up the great work, nicole

    • Rachel March 9, 2014 at 6:24 pm - Reply

      Have you ever heard of the Miss Manners column? (The syndicated column by manners expert Judith Martin). This issue reminds me of a letter someone wrote in asking why it was considered indecent to walk around in public in one’s underwear, on the beach or anywhere else, yet a bathing suit that showed even more skin was acceptable.

      Her answer was simple–clothing has a symbolic function, and we have to acknowledge and respect social rules regarding them. I imagine most of the public would regard a diaper as a form of underwear, and as such ought to kept under clothing. Were I to see a person in a diaper (and nothing else) on a beach or in a mall, my reaction would be the same as a person running around in boxers–it just doesn’t look right.

      • Jason March 9, 2014 at 7:03 pm - Reply

        Around the house, and when no one else is home, I might wear a tshirt, diapers, boxer briefs, and boxers. But when I’m out and about, I wear more than that. I usually wear khaki pants to work, or sweatpants.

  8. Spargano March 9, 2014 at 8:55 am - Reply

    I think the pacifier is more likely to indicate the rave scene than the adult baby scene, so the public might think about drugs.

    As for the main topic I agree with everyone else. If it is inappropriate to show your underwear it is probably inappropriate to show your diaper. I also would NEVER wear just a diaper on a beach, even a private one

    • Jason March 9, 2014 at 9:15 am - Reply

      Neither would I. I usually wear something over the top of my diapers. If I know someone is coming, I’ll usually wear underwear and sweatpants. That at least cuts down on the noise.

    • Rachel March 9, 2014 at 6:29 pm - Reply

      Spargano–the same thought occurred to me, but then, considering I’m middle-aged and look it, I doubt anyone would mistake me for a raver.

      • Spargano March 9, 2014 at 9:24 pm - Reply

        That made me laugh. Incidentally, I had more posted but it got cut off for some reason…

        I wanted ask, does it have to be a dummy/pacifier? Would gum/a pen/something else in the mouth work while out in public to help with the anxiety? I just feel that while our diapers help many of us with anxiety and give us self confidence, anxiety spikes when you know you are obvious to those around you. I would think the same of a pacifier. However, for you, as everyone is different, maybe ONLY a pacifier can work, and if that is so, then you don’t need the approval of us or ANYONE to do what you know you need to do.

        This gets back to the point that those people Adrian is decrying or either masochists or people that get off on making others feel uncomfortable. This has nothing do with diapers or adult babies….

        I think Eddie Izzard in his Dress to Kill performance summed this up well.

        Therefore, I think Adrian, ultimately, is only blowing off steam because she is preaching to the choir. “Executive ABDL” would never DO that and I think that is the sort of people her site attracts. Socially well adjusted folks, professionals, students, retirees who enjoy diapers and if you were ever told it about those folk that they like diapers you would be shocked…. because they don’t feel the need to “change” society to get a free pass on whatever the hell they want to do today… We can enjoy who we are and just need to continue to show we are normal, as anyone else with a fetish.

        • Rachel March 14, 2014 at 12:48 pm - Reply

          Spargano: Yes, for me it has to be a pacifier, as nothing else in my mouth gives me quite the same feeling. WHY it has to be a pacifier is a mystery to me, and try as I might, I cannot adequately articulate my reasons. I’m not into humiliation, after all, nor am I an exhibitionist, “LOOK AT MEEEEE!” sort of individual. (I strive to be exactly the opposite, and blend into a crowd.)

          I suppose it might be that it not only feels different from anything else I ever put in my mouth (gum, candy, cigarettes, etc.) it’s something I missed out on when I was younger, as I didn’t suck a pacifier when I was small. Though whether that was my mother’s decision, or if I simply didn’t like them then, I don’t know. But I can’t even use the excuse that it conjures up old memories, as my diapers do.

        • wetbaby3 April 3, 2014 at 3:08 am - Reply

          If more of the younger groop wore diapers maybe they would not have there pants down to there knees and have there underwear showing I don’t think that is right eather

  9. david March 10, 2014 at 7:27 pm - Reply

    What a great thing to bring up, I have been doing the adult baby side for a very long time, I was born in 55 wore from then on it started out a bed wetting problem, diapers plastic pants to keep bed dry then being dressed like a baby, because they knew i could stop, this was a punishment and trying to see if i would stop then and there it was my way of getting attention from my stepmother, soon it was full time,in 75 i got hurt in the service it was something i had to live with, its like dont all ways wish for something it comes true, some times, yes i have worn baby clothes but it was a function of adult babys in private setting,No i would not wear in a public area, its hard right now because there are those that think its funny to, t harm this live style in other ways,there are all kinds of fetish,cosplay and other things that people are doing now,I have a friend who makes my cloth diapers she was open to selling on a few auction sites but she has stopped because there are more then a few so called AB/DL i call them so called because they are out there to cause harm and hurt to others who try to make our lifes the real AB/DL s life as comfortable as we can she has been asked to change, there diapers could she be there mommy, would she be there for them , and its sad to say even sexual stuff so this goes were lots of us dont see that is why some sellers choose to not sell or jack there prices up s high its hard to find what we really like and want David

  10. david March 10, 2014 at 7:35 pm - Reply

    So what im saying wearing in public is not the only thing that will hurt this life syle, its a few who want to be called trouble makers

    • Jason March 10, 2014 at 8:43 pm - Reply

      I have no Adult Baby clothes, although sometimes I wish I did. I don’t see it as anything sexual. To me, diapers are another form of underwear. If I had onesies to wear over my diapers, I’d wear them.

      • ericklydiaperman2 June 7, 2014 at 8:03 pm - Reply

        Hey Jason, i’ll sell you mine, they’re too big for me, they’re mediums.

        • Jason June 7, 2014 at 10:26 pm - Reply

          Hey Ericklydiaperman2. I’m afraid I’m way too big for them. I’d need an XL or a XXL.

  11. Sofia October 6, 2014 at 12:51 am - Reply

    Wow this is a really cool post. I have never met you in person Adrian but you’re the best girl I have ever known. I really like who you are 🙂

    I also like your ANIMATED picture of your self at the top of the page.

    This post tells us we have our rights and freedom to wear our diapers but we must understand the truths even though we totally hate the truths in order to protect and grow our precious ABDL community.

    When we wear diapers, we all want to show that diapers are more than just for babies, incontinence and the elderly which is why we have our ABDL community but when it comes to public and socially it is very important just like Adrian said that we do this the most appropriate ways so we can grow, protect and have our ABDL community peacefully.

    If you know wearing just wearing your underwear in places, stores, the mall, restaurants, grocery stores, the movie theatre or anywhere else is wrong then you should know its wrong doing it in diapers too.

    I’m guessing its wrong just prancing in a diaper because people will think that we are strip fans or pornography fans. We want to show ABDL not strip/pornography.

    When it’s night time around 9pm I always like watching tv or a movie. I always like doing this by just wearing a T-Shirt and a Bellissimo Diaper on my sofa and eat popcorn and a soda. I usually like green, blue, purple and pink solid cartoon animated T-Shirts. I don’t know what you guys think but you should try it because its my favorite babyish style of watching a movie or tv in my room. I really love being in just a T-Shirt and a diaper especially with all the animated characters on the Bellissimo Diaper.

    Let me know what you guys think. Remember play nicely like Adrian said. 🙂 🙂 🙂

    • Bambino October 7, 2014 at 8:46 pm - Reply

      I would have too agree with you Sofia. I like watching tv in just a diaper and t-shirt too at times. However, when in public I’m very respectful about covering up. I wear 24/7 due to OAB and I pack a little back pack with me when I leave the house.

      • Sofia October 13, 2014 at 6:09 pm - Reply

        I very proud of you Bambino understanding diapers to be discreet in public. Good Job!!!!!!!

        • Jason October 13, 2014 at 7:54 pm - Reply

          I do think she’s attractive wearing a diaper.

  12. Sofia October 6, 2014 at 1:35 pm - Reply

    Does anyone like Adrian’s animated picture of her self at the top of the page. I think she’s very cute in her diaper and white top resting on the floor. Every time I come to this website, I love seeing her picture at the top. 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

    • Jason October 6, 2014 at 1:38 pm - Reply

      Pictures are nice, but I’m more interested in what she has to say.

  13. Sofia October 6, 2014 at 6:12 pm - Reply

    Well I like both her pictures and what she has to say.

    • Jason October 6, 2014 at 6:25 pm - Reply

      I like the pictures, but I have neither the money, nor the means with which to pay for the Premium package. I do like reading about her experiences with diapers and being able to comment. At least I don’t have to pay for that. 🙂

      • Sofia October 13, 2014 at 6:01 pm - Reply

        Hey Jason, Do you think she’s cute in her diaper, because I really like it that Adrian is resting on the floor with a white top. Please make her happy by saying YES!!!!!!!!

  14. Sofia October 13, 2014 at 5:53 pm - Reply

    Thats ok Jason, I don’t have access to the pictures either.

  15. Sofia October 20, 2014 at 12:03 am - Reply

    When you go to pools or beaches, some guys wear speedos. They are not that much different than diapers because you will see their whole body in diapers and speedos. Do you think its ok to be in just a diaper laying on a beach?

    • Bambino October 21, 2014 at 1:27 am - Reply

      A girl can get away with it, but not a guy! I’m indifferent on this. I would like to wear on a beach, but then again I have mixed emotions. The freedom and not being judged would be nice, but that would be a world that doesn’t exist.

      • Sofia October 23, 2014 at 5:22 pm - Reply

        Why can a girl get away with it but not a guy Bambino?

        • Bambino October 23, 2014 at 7:25 pm - Reply

          Hi Sofia,
          Even you, yourself thinks Adrain is adorable in her diapers but I have yet to see you say the same about any guy. Please don’t think I’m picking on you that’s not my intent. Unfortunately men are most of the perpetrators out there.
          If a gal was on the beach in a diaper, no one would say much. If a guy was, they would automatically think he’s weird, a perv, or child molester and 90+% chance he would have the authorities called on him to check him out. I highly doubt a gal would receive the same response.
          Women can wear anything on the beach from a two piece, to a thong, to wearing a thong and going topless and nothing is said.
          A man can wear a speedo on the beach and after he walks buy people will chuckle. I’ve seen both of these with my own eyes. Then you throw in the mix man on the beach in a diaper, no way….no how…don’t even risk it to be labeled a sex offender. We are men living in a women’s world of control when it comes to sex, nudity or kinks. There’s my two cents….:) guys chime in please.
          Also Adrians husband has pictures of himself on here and I don’t see you say anything about him. Just trying to make my point, not picking at you, promise:)

          • Jason October 23, 2014 at 7:43 pm

            I’ve never seen an adult, male or female, wearing diapers. It wouldn’t bother me in the least if I did. Is it normal? Maybe, maybe not. But that shouldn’t make it wrong or weird.

          • Sofia October 24, 2014 at 12:24 am

            Oh thats ok Bambino, no worries 🙂 🙂 🙂 I’m still happy.

            It really just depends which kind people you are with at the beach and which beach you go to.

            The beach that I go to is partially discreet and its mainly hispanics here. There aren’t very much white people.

            Im very sure you can get different reactions from people so I can’t promise you what reactions you get.

            I really would like 100% freedom of just wearing a diaper on the beach regardless who you are, what gender you are and what race. I know we have assholes and abusive people out there which we all hate.

            I don’t mind people wearing diapers if they are just laying down for relaxing and comfort under an umbrella on a lounge chair.

            Whats not ok according to me is if they are purposely prancing in diapers on the beach.

            Im very loyal when it comes to diapers.

            I don’t know why it has to be a problem to others.

            I have some tips that guys can follow to avoid reactions:

            -Choose a spot on the beach where there’s no one around or not very much people around.

            -Do it only on a lounge chair under an umbrella for discreet.

            -Do not choose a spot where people can see you easily.

            -Have a towel or a blanket ready so you can cover yourself when some is approaching or walking near you.

          • Bambino October 24, 2014 at 10:33 am

            Hi Sofia,
            I’m a 100% loyal diaper person like you and most on here. They’re great and serve many purposes. It doesn’t bother me to see anyone in them. I was trying to answer your question on why I feel it’s different for guys.
            You gave some good tips. I have been to the beach wearing a diaper under my board shorts and no issues. I think it boils down to respect, your at location, if your trying to be discrete, and what your wearing. I think that’s great your open minded. Only if most of society was that way, and people wouldn’t go out and do stupid things:).

          • Sofia October 24, 2014 at 12:52 am

            If it makes you feel any better, bad stuff can happen to females too.

            I have seen two young ladies/girls get arrested for stealing. Females are criminals too.

            I saw the police handcuffed the ladies lively.

            That doesn’t mean they get exceptions just because they are girls or woman.

            Stealing is stealing and women and girls definitely do it too, not just males.

            Both males and females have responsibilities.

            I’m a girl and I think guys need to respected too, not just woman and girls.

            Discrimination is just stupid. We need to get along if we want to live peacefully.

  16. Sofia October 20, 2014 at 12:25 am - Reply

    Have you guys seen the movie Dodgeball with Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn. One of the teams at the tournament go prancing in diapers. The asian looking people are brave to play in just diapers. I also think its funny when the Average Joes team got the wrong uniform on the first round. Owen (Joel Moore) comes out with a strange metal underwear and bars on his chest and near his mouth which I think is funny too. The whole audience in the movie think its weird when Average Joes are in the wrong uniform.

  17. aspie2 January 20, 2015 at 2:09 pm - Reply

    As an AB I often go for long walks dressed as a toddler with my teddy. wear cloths over my diaper’s but I am not afraid to let my diaper’s show either. I often walk around with a visible diaper bulge in my rear from a large BM. I usually continue walking till I am at the point of leaking then walk back home. Since walk quite quickly people never really have a chance to say anything about the poop smell as I never stay in one place for longer than a minute with a messy bum, unless im at home.

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