Do you like adult pull-ups? I don’t. I actually think they are awkward and worthless.
None of them are cute – especially, when you compare them to adult diapers. Adult diapers have that nice crinkly, comfortable, and secure feeling to them. While, adult pull-ups feel flimsy, loose, non-fitting, and like they are going to leak all the time.
Adult pull-ups are worthless in the ABDL community. No company puts out an adult pull-up like the baby pull-ups. It is unfortunate. Honestly, I would probably not even wear a pull-up if it was made as I much prefer adult diapers. I do know some people would love to have an adult version of Goodnights pull-ups.
If a company designed an adult pull-up like the old Goodnights pull-ups just a bit thicker – I would be tempted to try them out for old time sake.
I have tried on the adult pull-ups in the past almost just out of curiosity…they are bizarre. That is the best way to describe it. They practically leaked on the first wetting, didn’t fit me properly and were just plain awkward feeling. I immediately changed back into a Bambino Diaper and went on my merry way.
I feel the only people wearing adult pull-ups besides the true incontinent community is those people that find a super cheap deal on them and are unaware the other choices of diapers there are out there. Maybe the younger generation who do not have much money and are willing to take whatever they can get when it comes to the diaper “feel”. I don’t know…
But, my question is this…Do you think the adult pull-up is worthless? Besides the true incontinent community who uses them for very light wettings – are they practically useless?
My opinion is unconditionally…Yes. No protection. No comfort. Lack of proper fit. This all adds up to a useless undergarment.
What is your opinion of adult pull-ups?
I’ve tried the kind you see in stores, like the one in the photo, and while they do look cute, they are as worthless as they’ll get.
Honestly, I disagree. I think that a lot of the issues that people face with pull ups is the fit. The sizes that they give on the store brands are completely off, and you need to just try on a few instead of relying on their suggested sizes. I have tried the abena abri-flex pullups and the tena extra absorbency pull ups (none of which are found in stores) and found them both to be not only as effective as their similarly thick diapers, but frankly fit better as well, both in size small. Given your previous descriptions on your diaper size, Adrian, there is frankly nothing in the store save the children’s pull ups or goodnites that will fit you. You might have better luck trying one of the Tenas or abenas in a small size.
While nothing will ever replace my Tena Maxi Slips or Bellisimos, it is sometimes just easier to put on a pull up to go to the store, because I am still padded, and don’t have to go through the whole rigamarole of putting on a full diaper, and it is also more discreet.
For a quick trip to the store, yes. If it is only for an emergency because 75% of the time you can make it to the toilet, yes.
But changing a pull-up in public was the most awkward experience I have ever had in diapers. Having to take off my shoes, pants, plastic pants in order to slip a new one on was ridiculous to me. I only did this because I was on a trip and they were the only diapers available at the store I was at (my flight had been canceled and I had run out of my normal diapers… Pack more than you need).
I don’t see the economic sense in them if they cost almost as much as their diaper counterparts. We can dress modestly to hide diaper bulge without needing to depend on pull-ups.
I wholeheartedly agree, Adrian. I think they are worthless on every level. I also think many in the IC community think they are too. With exception of stress ic, they simply fail.
I was reading about the Abena ones as the best bet if people want them, which I get if you are genuinely trying to get to the bathroom. I used to scoff at this theory, thinking one could just wear a normal diaper and pull the equipment out if needed, but as my diapering technique improved I learned that it should be too tight to do that, plus putting your equipment back in the right position afterwards becomes problematic, so I can see the need for a pull-up style for attempting to get to the toilet, but if your OAB urges cause floods, I think you are better off with a traditional diaper regardless.
As for cuteness, meh, pull-ups came out just after I was potty trained so I never tried them and couldn’t fit into them when I gained interest. The adult pull-ups felt like I was wearing underwear that was way too big for me that leaked even with a small wetting. Even the real-fit leaked easily…. So, yeah, as you said, worthless!
Tena makes a great mens pull-up that is very absorbent and fits well. I use this when I’m playing sports .
I’ve tried the Abena pull-ups but the waist isn’t good enough to keep them up and in place. While the Abena may be absorbent you won’t be able to reach that capacity because for a male the padding ends low in the front and any shift down causes leaks.
Yes…..I’ve tried them in the past and they’re weird looking. Not mention, no protection, no comfort and lack of proper fitting as you mentioned. Not even worth the money at all.
I tried Depends underwear for men, and I found even their Large size to be too small to fit comfortably.
Yeah they are worthless, they do not fit, they leak, they go everywhere but not were they should be(in place)
I agree. Why they were ever offered in stores is beyond me. Unless your incontinence is extremely mild (and whose is?), they’re useless, not just for ABs and DLs, but for anyone who’s incontinent.
Sorry but pull-ups are worthless, bought a pack s/m and they leak right away. So I bought a l/xl and even double packed, I had to change within the hour. I will not buy depends pull ups anymore
I agree. I’ve tried them, in L/XL size, and they were crap. They were still too small to fit comfortably. And if you only leak a small amount, barely a dribble, they’d be fine. But anything more than that, they leak in a hurry.
I’ve never liked the way they looked and they definitely don’t fit right or absorb much. And yes, Goodnites is the only type of pull-up I’ve ever liked. That combo of padding and fitness is exceptionally rare.
I’ve tried the Goodnites, and unfortunately, they’re not available in Adult sizes. I’m a big boy, and I like something that fits snug, but not too tight. Unfortunately what’s available is nowhere near that size.
Nice post, Adrian :). I am incontinent and not quite a DL but getting there…LOL. I find most pull-ups to be (mostly) worthless as well for long-term heavy use. Abena Abri-Flex needs to be worn with a fitting product I find (theirs works best of course) otherwise they leak in the front of the leg. The Abri-Flex Special is more like a maxi pad in a lycra threaded boxer brief. Leaked every time, once in the middle of a store when I coughed. Nice…
Tena for men looks like jailhouse underwear…I mean come on…grey and white vertical stripes? Plus, with the lowest size going from 34 – 50, someone on the low-mid end won’t get a good fit (like me). I was lucky when I used them and they didn’t leak. Off-brands I stay away from…I tried them and they were horrible.
The only ones I will say I use on a regular basis is the Depend lines – both the underwear and Real Fits. Their S/M size in both gives me a nice snug fit and they rarely leak even on a good urge incontinence wetting (like out running errands and no chance to find a bathroom). The Depend underwear for men are my go to brand since you can get them online really cheap and Walgreens has sales on them a lot. I usually go through 2 a day if I work out, which comes to just over a dollar a day for protection. Plus the Depend site has coupons (yeah…you do have to walk in the store and carry the packages…you get used to it). I wear the Real-Fits if I am out for longer or need extra protection if my back is acting up and my bladder control is poor. They are a bit thicker and can take two mild wettings (of course, no flooding in either). Plus they are more comfortable and warmer in winter.
The best use I get out of them is after I urinate, when I think I am done I am really not…therefore they get the overflow for me. Much better than wet cold pants and pee in my socks.
I drink WAY too much water to be diapered 24×7…my skin would be soaked constantly. I tried it and it wasn’t fun. At least with the pull-ups my skin gets a break.
I guess I am one of the few here that thinks they are a great thing :).
Me personally, I have a full diaper and a pull up diaper, I can honestly say I do not like pull ups, not only does the fit not achieve what I need, but the feel and well yeah, anyway I am more secure and comfortable in an regular diaper and have confidence that it won’t leak at the smallest amount, while they do make some premium versions, I still say a complete diaper is the way to go, and I prefer the crinkly cutesy aspect to a diaper, but performance is key to me thank you to good brands out there.
I agree with u i myself have tried adult pull ups and hated them all the ones i tried leaked on the first wetting maybe its just me but they dont fit right and dont hold what adult diapers do now i can not afford bambino or abu products as much as i would love to but i have found great deals on adult diapers they hold more than those junky pull ups and they feel better i found a place online who sell adult diapers for a great price i got 96 tranquility ATN for only $80 bucks i am a size large they hold 33oz of fluid and r plasic backed
While I definitely prefer the feel and security of a diaper, they are not always practical for me. I’m not fully incontinent so having the option of wearing underwear allows me to still go to the toilet and pull down the underwear. But on the days I wear a diaper the diaper is basically my only choice to pee in so it ends up getting full and I have to change it which, as you know better than most Adrian, can be a bit of a hassle. I do appreciate having the underwear option. And I also appreciate your awesome blog and I like how you ask this question in order to stir up some good discussion 🙂
It depends on your level of incontinence and, of course, on the amounts you (over)produce. A good pull-up (and this can be store-brand, too) may be sufficient if you only need protection for some two hours or just a backup for the case there’s no toilet in reach. But even then (and I’m talking of Molicares and Tenas here!) you run the risk of leaking.
And yes, most pull-ups don’t fit very well unless you wear a snug-fittig bodysuit over them. On the other hand they are easier to hide than full-fledged adult diapers.
Honestly I think it depends on what your needs are. Would I ever use a pull up to replace a diaper? No way! But for my type of day leakage they’re actually more than I need. I simply don’t like just having a pad in my underwear, which doesn’t keep me completely feeling dry. Given how my body is shaped and what not, pull ups just work better as an absorbent underwear choice to replace normal underwear. Honestly Adrian it’s your encouragement of us all that finally got me taking the steps necessary to feel comfortable and protected. I wear the Tena Men’s, and I kinda like the stripes. They’re absorbent enough, and have helped contain the odd accident here and there. But they’re no replacement for diapers when I really need them, like at night. Then it’s into good quality premium diapers I go!
I like the old goodnites from back in the day. The tena small pull ups, the new depend active sure fit pull ups, and I think that’s it. Not too many favorites of pull ups. To tell you the truth I don’t really like them! I prefer disposable diapers with tapes. There’s not too many pull-ups out there that will fit me snugly right. I’m small in size and the sm/med packages just don’t fit. Too big, horrible, leaks, etc. Pull ups are a secondary alternative, not very fond of them, and I tried to just avoid them! I usually do. Unless there is a big sale on them, or it looks thick and small enough to fit me. I’ll consider it.
They’re fun for a change from a regular nappy – the higher absorbency Tena pants hold a fair bit, but they’re no substitute for a tape-on nappy as full time “toilet replacement” underwear.
The main drawbacks are the stretch/sag factor once they’re wet, and also the narrow crotch which minimises absorbency in the main area you tend to flood, that and the difficulty in making the leak guards effective means you soon get wet outer clothing if you overdo it. As others have said, they would hold up for someone who tries to get to the toilet but doesn’t quite make it, and goes in their pants standing up, changing straight after – for anyone who needs or likes something for heavier use, a tape-on nappy is the only solution.
I’m so used to wearing the tape-on diaper (nappy) that I prefer the tape-on diaper over the pull-on kind.
I hate pull-ups for all the reasons you mentioned and more. I have OAB and can make it to the toilet if I’m close enough (say, if I’m actually in the bathroom when the urge hits), but I don’t produce a trickle when I wet. For me, it’s a full-out flood, and it’s usually about three to four times more fluid than any pull-up is able to handle.
And as others have already said, changing them in a bathroom stall is a nightmare. I usually *cannot* change a pull-up unless I’m wearing a dress or a skirt, and even then, because of my cerebral palsy I have difficulty stepping into the pull-up. (I usually have to bend my stiff, recalcitrant legs in all manner of odd positions so I can put my foot through the hole). And even when I can, it’s often backwards….X( Typically, it can take me as long as twenty minutes to get one of those things on. A bit of a problem, as I’m usually on a tight schedule when I’m out in public.
With a diaper, however, while I’m sitting on the toilet I’ll place the diaper on my wheelchair seat, then transfer and lower myself onto it. From there I simply pull it between my legs, tape and go. That usually takes about half the time the pull-up does, and typically lasts for the duration of my trip.
No one can ever convince me that underwear-like diapers lessen the stigma of wearing them. I mean, just how discreet is a pair of jeans with a soaked front (or bottom)?
I totally agree. Why the Pull-Ups were ever invented is beyond me. My bladder control has always been iffy at best, non-existent at best. I’ve tried the pull-on diapers you see in stores, and while they’re generally discreet, they don’t protect at all. I found them to be just like wearing underwear, and peeing in underwear. They leak like there’s nothing there. Save your money and just buy diapers.
Jason: I know exactly why the pull-ups were invented. People have a hangup about wearing diapers, which is enforced by the erroneous and rigidly conformist belief that only babies wear diapers. I’ve actually been admonished for using the WORD diaper to describe what I use: “they’re BRIEFS!” One home-health worker I used to have used the word “briefs” even to describe my CLOTH diapers. It’s euphemistic language, and I hate euphemistic language.
Instead of worrying about preserving others’ “dignity” in regard to wearing diapers, we need to change attitudes so a person can actually say “I wear diapers” without embarrassment. Because there’s truly nothing to be embarrassed about. Whether one’s dignity is affected by it is up to the wearer–you’re only as embarrassed as you allow yourself to be.
I know–preaching to the converted, right?
I know what you mean. I’ve never liked conformist thinking. I use DIAPERS. DIAPERS, DIAPERS, DIAPERS. There, I said it. I know some people who would have my head on a platter for using Diapers rather than briefs, but frankly, I don’t give a damn. 🙂
I would have to agree with you Rachel. While I don’t wear pull ups and strictly wear Bambinos 24/7 due to my OAB and dribbles there are times pull ups would be nice if there were quality and very comfy ones. Example, I was out fishing on Oregon on a 6 person charter. I was bugged about not needing to use the pee container. Mind you I wore a Bellissimo and was about to untape that. I said I don’t need to go. If I had a pull up on I could of pulled down and used the pee container (gross) and then pulled the pull up, up. It would be great to catch my after dribbles and leakage but that’s about it due to there current quality and comfort.
I agree totally. I’m able-bodied. I don’t need a wheelchair to get around.
I *HATE* adult pullups. I tried them in high school when I started having bladder problems and my bladder was still giving me notice before leaking, but when things got worse they weren’t viable.
I tried them a few years later in university, when I was living in residence (thankfully, got my own room thanks to a letter basically saying “Yes, I am incontinent, can provide doctor’s note to that effect”), as I was trying to be less conspicuous (I both was and wasn’t). But they just weren’t worth it. I have IBS, but haven’t had a bowel accident in a long time, so…it seemed like a good tradeoff, except for the leaks. So I gave it up after a week (surprised I lasted that long) and switched back to diapers. Haven’t looked back since.
I’ve tried the pull-on diapers you see in stores, and they suck big time. They’re fine for dribble incontinence, but who has that? I prefer diapers anyway, for they’re way more absorbent.
No offense Jason, but I have “dribble” incontinence. Nerve damage sucks. Not everyone voids equally 🙂 I suffer retention and incontinence (which is definitely odd) but the spine is wired in weird ways. Pull-ups, if they work, are just fine. The pull-up aisles at drug stores aren’t stocked well for no reason. They have to sell product to keep the shelves stocked.
Hey Colin. I agree. Perhaps I should’ve said that not everyone has dribble incontinence.
I have seen the commercials from Depends trying to depict their pull-ups to be anything but diapers for the very reason that society is not diaper friendly. Pull-ups are marketed to give those that wear them the feeling that they are not wearing diapers and should be proud. The functionality of Pull-ups is more like training pants and meant to provide the wearer with the discretion to use the potty at times. For an ABDL like me, I have no need for pull-ups and want to be reminded that I am in fact in diapers. I need my diapers and use them just like a toddler that is not potty trained. Pull-ups were not invented when I was younger, so my transition garment from diapers to underwear were these plastic backed training pants that looked like a thicker version of gerber plastic pants. I had to wear these to school and they offered moderate protection, but I was often diapered when my IBS flared up and my control vanished altogether. I don’t relate to Pull-ups and prefer diapers.
I’ve seen those Pull-Ups ads on tv. At the time, I thought it was a good idea, a pull-on style diaper that reduces leaks should a child have an accident. The only thing I didn’t like was the statement, “I’m a big kid now!” It’s as if they’re stating that they’re no longer dependent on diapers. The kids look like they’re between two and three yrs age. That doesn’t mean that they’re no longer dependent on diapers. I’ve never understood why society isn’t diaper friendly.
When I was in school, they didn’t have the Pull-Ups. They didn’t come until the early 90s when I was in high school. I’m not against the idea of training pants, I just didn’t like the disposable kind. When I was little, they didn’t have disposable training pants, they had cloth, washable training pants where you could actually feel you’re wet.
I’m somewhat of a diaper newbie (last six months), so I have a little bit of a different perspective. I’m not incontinent, but I find diapers extremely useful as a taxi driver as the opportunities for bathroom breaks are very limited.
I still struggle with diapers somewhat, even though I acknowledge that they are much easier to put on in bathroom stalls. I am quite a large man with a 54″ waist, and with my stomach being wider than my hips I have a hard time taping on a diaper so that it stays on when I stand up. This is despite me being well within the size range for the diaper. I use underwear to hold it in place, but it still takes me a while to tape them on just right. (I usually use either the Abena L4s or the Secure X-Pluses). I can see how for a woman with hips wider than her waist, the tapes would work very well, but for a big guy where the situation is reversed, it becomes more difficult for them to stay as they should.
As for the pull ups, yes they don’t absorb as much, but for me they seem to fit a little better and the advantage is that if a bathroom becomes available, I can use the bathroom without wetting the brief and thus have it last longer. Typically for a long driving shift, I will start the day with a pull-up (Secure’s seem to be the best, though Depends’ and Walgreens’ are surprisingly good, I find) and then when I do need to change, change into a tabbed diaper since they’re easier to change into, and use those for the rest of the day.
I don’t poop in my diapers as I fear that would be too messy and stink up the cab, but once I had an unexpected accident as I was getting out of the cab to use the restroom–probably due to something I ate. I had an Abena pullup with a booster pad, and to my surprise that worked extremely well and what could have been a major disaster turned into a minor inconvenience. (Adrian’s recommendation for the towel-size wipes came in VERY handy.)
This is still trial and error for me, so if anyone has any insights as to how I can make this whole thing work better for me, I’d appreciate it.
I’m a fairly big guy myself. I’ve a 45″ size waist. I need to wear big sized adult diapers. Unfortunately, some of the pull-on diapers I’ve tried, even their largest, seem to be made for someone with a 30-35″ waist. Although most of the time, I wet my diapers, I have, on a couple of occasions, messed my diaper.
I have M.S. so usually as it goes (I;m sure alot of the community agree with me,or mabey not ) It all depend upon how I feel that particular day. As far as I am concerned diapers are much easier to change wether in a bathroom or if I am in bed most of the day. I have been to many hospitals in the past few years and I have had most nurses say that the pull ups work very well and should just try to wear those. UH…hello? I am usually in the hospital because my body hurts so bad (particularly from the waist down.) I can’t properrly change because my legs are so messed up! Diapers are the way to go for me.
I use Depends Real-Fit for men. I wear them during the week under my dress pants. They are discreet and offer protection for one wetting. They also give me the option to use the washroom. However on the weekend it is different. I use a disposable adult diaper (attends or tena extended wear) along with a cloth training and plastic pants for added protection. To add some level of discreetness I also wear a diaper onesie and regular underwear over all of this.
I’ve tried Depend Real-Fit, and they’re way too small for my body. Even in Large, I might as well be wearing a Small, or X-Small.
Unfortunately I completely agree :/ they don’t do enough, and the lack of protection plastic is a deal breaker for me.
I agree. I’ve tried various pull-ups and protective underwear. They’re fine for dribble incontinence, but not much more than that.
I preferr the Pampers Easyups for girls 4t-5t but I’ve tried Huggies Pull ups 4t-5t ehh Pampers won tried a adult diaper both Pampers and huggies win
I’ve never been a fan of the pull-on diapers you see in stores. I’ve tried them, and I might as well be using a thin piece of napkin to absorb what I do. They leak like sieves. That’s not cool. If I have to wear pull-ups, I’d rather wear cloth pull-ups and plastic pants.
Adrian, these posts are AWSOME!!!!! I Love what people are posting. People need to open their eyes bout diapers, not just for babies, mentally retarded, elderly or medical condition people, Anybody who wants to be comfortable, stress free, ext…
I totally agree. Diapers aren’t just for babies, the disabled, mentally retarded, or even the elderly. And they never have been. I remember when I was about 7 yrs old (I’m now 41) and seeing adult diapers stocked on store shelves. It puzzled me, considering what I was told about diapers being for babies, that there’d be diapers for adults. They were labelled “briefs”, which simply added to the confusion for me.
Diapers are AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I would love to see a pull-up similar to goodnites that fits snug and not look like I wrapped a loose paper towel around my waist. Something a little thicker and that can handle an adult wetting at least once. Something I could hide easier under my shorts or underwear. I usually like to wear a diaper while traveling long distance and a pull-up like that would probably be a lot more comfortable than a regular diaper and a little cooler too. Also, it would be something I could wear to bed and maybe not be as embarrassed around my wife and easily hide under my shorts in case the kids need my attention at night. She don’t care if I do, but I just feel odd for some reason. I tend to dribble some at night and a pull-up would be great for handling that, so I don’t have to get up so many times!
as a guy who likes to see ab/dl girls in diapers,i dont think the adult pull ups are cute at all or very babyish.i feel the standard cloth diaper and plastic pants is the most babyish form of diapers and have seen many girls wearing them for various reasons.to me there is nothing cuter than a teen girl wearing a cloth diaper and adult size pink plastic pants and a tee shirt!.
I’m not a fan of pull ups because, I’M NOT POTTY TRAINING! Mainly for the same reason I drink from a baba instead of a sippy cup, I’ll never graduate to those levels. As a bABy I believe you should crawl when you can, wear extremely thick DIAPERS, drink your baba, & generally just continue being a bABy!
The baby-size ones aren’t useful and don’t fit me, the adult ones aren’t useful and aren’t cute. Also, pull-ups are designed for a stage of increasing control – if there’s any change in a statistically average AB’s continence it would probably be in the other direction.
I’ve tried pull-ups you see in stores, and I find them useless at best. I’ve also tried the cloth pull-ups similar to what toddlers wore 40+ yrs ago, except in adult sizes. You still have to wear waterproof pants over them to prevent leaks, but I find them more comfortable and practical than the store bought pull-ups.
Hello everyone I am sorry I have to disagree with the no like people…I wear and like my pullups, I know I can not wet them as many times as my diapers but when I go to work I don’t wear a full diaper for the reason that they might be noticed, so I wear pullups..I am wearing Tena extra’s right now and fine them very good I can wet them up to 3 maybe 4 times with out fear of them leaking. I have tried many brands and yes some of them are garbage..I use a booster sometimes like a Tranquility booster or a female Poise pad the long ones and can wet at least 2 to 3 more times…Let me say too I have tried alot of different brands of diapers too and some of them are garbage too…Its the same as anything if we want to put labels on things not everything is acceptable to every one…Just my thoughts…
I 100% agree. I have tried on boys and girls Goodnites and boys and girls pull ups as well as the adult pull ups. Not even effective and they leaked too. Well for an AB/DL girl, girls or boys Goodnites may work apart from the baby or adult ones but for an AB/DL boy, naw. I really tried Tranquility ATN diapers but they are not as effective as Depend Diapers. Depend diapers have 6 tape tabs, green leak guards and they are super absorbent with almost 0 leaks. However, they redesigned them to where they are more discreet and crinkle very little but they still have that plastic cover. I still love them though.
I tried them when!i first had to wear diapers and was completely turned off i turned to depends protection with tabs and then as i did my homework wellness briefs and bambino bellisimo became my fav the wellness company came out with some pull ups not sure what they look like though and i prefer the regular diaper style
I have tried adult pull ups and was turned off. I just wear them because I like how they feel and sometimes to prevent accidents though I am not incontinent. They are worthless! I like depends protection with tabs. They have side leak guards and hold a heavy wetting very well. Adult pull ups? Not so much. I wouldn’t even wear them for any reason. And depends protection with tabs have had a price reduction recently since they had some improvements done to them. Bottom line Adrian…..Yes I agree with you they are worthless.
The new ALWAYS brand pull up/underwear offers super protection and although marketed to and styled for women has a front panel that rises high enough for males. The leak guards work really well too. Hubby and I both wear them
Most “cloth like” covers give me instant rashes. And most of these “protective underwear” do not have padding that passes the butt crack.
Tranquility is the only one that seems to cover the crack. It also has high coverage in the front.
Then I have found with most “protective underwear” is the elastic breaks almost immediately.
Gompels Pullups are superb. (Amazon Uk) excellent design, make and fit. Almost as absorbent as a heavy duty diaper.
,Here’s my solution especially for travel. I use a wheelchair and have to take 3 hour bus trips to a dr out of town each month ( a specialist). The bus has a tiny bathroom but even if my chair would fit which it won’t, I cannot move during the trip because my wheelchair is secured to the floor in 5 places. I should also add that I have cerebral palsy. Ergo tape is next to impossible for me to do because my hands have trouble with fine motor.
I wear a small medium typically. However for travel, I get a package of rite aid or Walgreens over night. Actually I get 2 packs. One small/medium and one extra large. On the day of my trip, I wear the small/medium like normal. I also tear open the sides of the xlarge and lay the resultant flat pad inside the first pair like a period pad pad. I fold bag the front end so it doesn’t stick out.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not exactly comfortable. It’s a lot of padding to sit on. Nevertheless, if things go well, “ changing “ in public only means taking out the inner pair
Try Tena Super Plus, the type that are specific to Male or Female. They are the only underwear that have held a wetting for me.
Seems like I’m in the minority here (which is fine lol) but I love pull ups. I play as a bit of an older kid and they really get me into a good headspace. Its great for “accidents” if I go in my pants i feel so much smaller with that risk of leaking and knowing they arent made to hold so much.
Diapers are way better than pull ups and you can set the taps for a good dry fit